Anna Karenina Syndrome: Victims Of Love

When we talk about the so-called  Anna Karenina syndrome, this does not mean the very dramatic way in which the story of the female protagonist of the book ends.

Instead, that syndrome refers to the obsession, passion, and strong emotional bond that a person can experience when falling in love, in which case a person may go beyond their own boundaries.

So this time, we are talking about a dangerous passion that may do more harm than good to a person. We explain in more detail why  obsessive relationships can be very detrimental to human health.

1. Anna Karenina Syndrome: Passionate Love and Its Dangers

It is said that if a person has experienced a very passionate love in his past, he misses that feeling, even knowing what pain and suffering its loss caused. 

Intense emotions make a person feel alive – powerful emotions that include physical attraction, emotional connection, mutual commitment, and obsession. This can create a bond in which “you and I” take on their full meaning. In such a relationship, many things are intertwined.

However, there are many risks to keep in mind regarding passion:

• Those people who suffer from that syndrome have experienced something other than falling in love. They are, in fact, struggling with emotional obsession, and this includes a certain lack of personal control, as well as complete dependence where one cannot see one’s own limits. In this case, he may lose himself to the person he loves, give up what defines him as himself, and surrender to the control of another person so that this does not disappear.
• However, this kind of love does not bring real happiness, because what usually happens is the pain that the other person is not present all the time – this is due to a lack of trust, the fear of being rejected or the fear of betrayal. A person feels that he is giving himself more than in a relationship with the other party.
• Gradually, a person loses their self-esteem, integrity, and emotional balance. When life focuses on another person in such an obsessive way, the result may be the loss of your own life, and nothing is more destructive than this.

2. Passionate love: how can it be controlled?

Everyone knows that in the early stages of a love relationship, it is normal to feel an intense and indescribable passion. However, there are a few things to keep in mind to avoid the dangerous Anna Karenina syndrome.

So consider these guidelines for you:

• Never look for a partner on the basis that he or she should be able to “fill in your gaps” or be your “other half”. Your only goal in life must not be to find the “other half”. Instead, it is important to grow internally and be a full person – balanced and mature. You should be able to be happy as an individual and at the same time be able to bring happiness to others. So don’t look for other people to fill your own emptiness or medicine for your fears. Look for a partnership that is mutually enriching.

• Be wary of relationships where you are not allowed freedom and where you cannot grow or which make you lose your integrity or what determines you. Loving is about winning and growing – not losing your own boundaries. Obsessions are never good because they set limits on life. When you put another person first, you start losing things. You put aside your own hobbies, friends, and even your own values. And this, of course, doesn’t lead to anything good – an example is Anna Karenina’s absolute passion for Vronsky, which even led her to push her own son aside.

• Never make the mistake of loving blindly. Love “with open eyes”, with an open heart and in a conscious way. So love so that you look at everything you do and at the same time see everything that another person is doing to you. Does he respect your needs? Does he listen to you and keep you in mind? Does he let you grow as a person, and at the same time does he let the relationship grow?  True love is not obsessive. It is daily happiness that involves both people being able to solve problems, listen to each other, honor their promises, and live without jealousy, mistrust, or intimidation.

Anna Karenina syndrome is very common in today’s relationships. So love intensely, love passionately, but never love blindly.