Can You Set Boundaries In Relationships?

It is important for all of us to  think a little bit about how to set appropriate boundaries in human relationships. Putting boundaries on others when this is necessary is something that is worth incorporating into your own life right away.

When you love someone, you know it’s very hard to say “no”. There may be many things you don’t like, but you still can’t easily refuse them, no matter how hard they put up with.

This may be because you have submitted yourself to your partner, love. The situation can be so serious that you are completely dependent on your partner.

Now we’ll tell you why and how it would be good to set boundaries in relationships – keep reading if you feel there’s room for improvement in this area of ​​your own life.

This is how you set the boundaries in relationships

Even if you love, it is still necessary to sometimes say “no”

When you are in love, it is nevertheless worth giving a negative answer when you feel that your values ​​are not being respected. As in any relationship, sometimes again you have to give up and find some compromise.

For example, if you don’t feel like you want to watch a movie, but your partner loves it, you can of course agree – as long as that concession is appreciated and you get back the same flexibility from someone else the other day.

But what happens when a partner tries to manipulate? Or what if he becomes jealous when you’re out with your friends?

In that case, it’s important that you stay firm and say “no”. Give yourself the space you deserve and stop submitting to the will of another. If you don’t, you’re sure to end up on a very rugged path in your relationship.

First, remember that self-esteem should always be your priority. Sometimes, however, love makes a person so blind that we extend ourselves completely to another and allow him to harm ourselves. That is why it is so important to set boundaries in a relationship with the other party.

Thoughts like “when someone really loves you, he makes you cry” or “I’m nothing without you” have made torture tolerated in many relationships. These relationships lack respect and situations become ongoing, and it would indeed be necessary to say “no”.

It is therefore worth refusing to continue to tolerate behavior that is absolutely not love, but rather abuse, control, manipulation and pain.

So if you’re in love, and even if it’s hard to set boundaries for another,  learn to say “no”. This will allow you to better maintain your own boundaries in the relationship. Make it clear what your own limits are whenever necessary.

 Recognize and set your boundaries in human relationships

In order to find out what your absolute limits are when you are in love, you must first think about your own values.

To do this, you should  make a list of all the values ​​that are important to you. Perhaps they are respect, kindness, generosity, and freedom. Think about these things properly! And most importantly, write down your values.

Once you have done this, place a column next to the values. Then write down everything that could happen in your relationship and that would violate these values ​​and be a reason to leave the person in the past.

These are your limits. They are the things you are not willing to put up with, and if they happen to you one time, you say “no” to another, you put a wall between you and end the relationship.

Thinking about your own boundaries is very difficult. It may seem that once you are in love, you have no boundaries at all. It’s really wonderful what we can put up with when we’re in a relationship.

Perhaps for you, one limit would be infidelity. In addition, your limits could be harm, lying, or indifference. Write these down and keep them in mind.

When it comes to your own values, you need to be faithful to them and not tolerate anyone who offends them.

What is your own perception of love?

The reason you can’t say “no” or set your own boundaries to protect the values ​​you know you deserve is perhaps this: society has created a very unhealthy perception of love, and this is still on our minds to this day.

Love seems to mean that for the sake of one, everything is given — mind, body, and soul — so far that the other is responsible for our own happiness.

Maybe you think it’s really necessary that you have someone by your side, because being alone would be just awful! So when you have a partner, you may do many things to avoid losing him. One of these things is that you let him violate your own boundaries.

Firmly set boundaries in your new relationship so you can start the relationship on a healthy footing.

When you hear stories of how many abused women didn’t report to their partner but instead returned to her, what do you think was going on? It is precisely about borders.

It is very important that in these situations, the person makes clear what is not OK. Otherwise, he lets his partner destroy his self-esteem and begins to believe that he deserves all the bad that is happening to him.

However, such “love” is not love. If you are in love, you should still love yourself first and foremost. Appreciate yourself and feel your own values. Then set boundaries in your relationship that no one should exceed.

Only in this way can you truly love another person and let him or her really love you.